


Don't Forget Sunscreen in the Middle of Summer

by ailaxolotl



Series: tumblr prompts [4]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: I wrote this in like half an hour at 1 am, M/M, but please read it anyways lol, it's.....Not Good, shitty canoeing au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-24 13:54:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8374615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ailaxolotl/pseuds/ailaxolotl
Summary: prompt from snorlaxlovesme: ed and ling go canoeing, neither of them are good at it, and someone falls into the river





	

“You know,” Ling said, not even trying to hide the shit-eating grin taking over his face as he leisurely swam down the river, “I think the real tragedy of the day is you forgetting to bring sunscreen. I can’t tell if you’re red because you’re so angry or because your skin is actually melting off of your face.”

\- - - 

Okay, so maybe Ed had exaggerated his canoeing abilities just slightly. Maybe. And maybe they had taken the wrong path when the river forked a few miles back (“Ed, are you sure you don’t want to take the easy way?” “No, you asshole, we can totally handle Class Three rapids, what do you take me for—“), but honestly, Ling was to blame for the whole ordeal, teasing Edward like that. 

Really, they could have handled the rapids if either of them had, you know, actual experience canoeing. But Edward certainly wasn’t going to admit that he had no idea what he was doing to Mister King of the Rapids. And Ling wasn’t going to admit that his “illustrious canoeing background” referred to the singular time he went with Lan Fan over ten years ago and they managed to capsize their canoe no less than three times.

So the end result was, of course, the two grown men shrieking their way down the rapids and colliding with nearly every boulder, tree limb, and sand bar along the way. Every time the current picked up and their poor canoe began to wobble over the choppy waves, Ed would begin paddling erratically, and Ling would yell at him to stop, and Ed would, of course, have to yell in return, and both would be so focused on yelling that they stopped looking ahead and—well, you get the idea. 

“Who thought this was a good idea? Why did I let you convince me this would be fun?” Edward groaned, his palms raw from clutching his paddle like it was a lifeline.

“Uh, I hate to remind you, but you were the one who suggested the activity!” Ling said, seemingly unperturbed by the fact that they had nearly died at least five times in the last hour. “Something about ‘fresh air and exercise’, I believe. Though I’m not sure why this was the best thing you could come up with? I know of plenty of hiking routes that involve a lot less potential drowning—“ 

What Ling had somehow failed to notice (and Edward had failed to mention) as he spoke were the massive sweepers hanging over the river that were now barreling into Ling’s face, Ed having ducked well in advance. 

“Ugh—Ed—help—too many leaves—“ Ling gasped, but the damage was already done. He began to fall back and out of the canoe, the branches pushing him further and further off-balance until Ling was hanging onto the canoe by little more than his feet. 

Edward only had a moment to glance back at Ling before he noticed a hand reaching out and grabbing onto his shirt like a vice—“Oh, no no no, you bastard, don’t you dare—” But Ling only held on tighter, and his eyes seemed to scream if I’m going down, I’m taking you with me. 

As Ling fell into the river, pulling Edward with him, Ed instinctively grabbed the edge of the canoe, scrabbling for something to balance with, but Ling was heavier than him and clearly intent on revenge. Slowly, Ed began to tilt, not letting go of the canoe, until—

SPLASH. The two fell into the river, the canoe completely flipping over, their paddles quickly floating downstream, followed a few moments later by their one—and only—means of safely traversing the river. 

Ling emerged first, sheepishly smiling at Ed’s figure as he rose from the water, bangs plastered across his face and braid falling apart. “I hate you so much, oh my god. I hate you so much it’s actually insane. You’re the spawn of satan.”

“Love you too, babe. So, should we start swimming? I’m pretty sure paying for a lost canoe is an expense neither of us can afford.”

Edward continued grumbling as he shoved his bangs out of his face, slowly paddling towards the shadow of their canoe, the distance between them growing with every moment.

They continued for a while in silence, until Ling took a look at Ed’s reddened ears and began to laugh.

“I swear to god Ling, what could possibly be funny about this situation.” Ed said in a monotone, not even bothering to look behind him at Ling’s face, which was quickly adopting Ed’s Least Favorite Ling Grin.

“Oh, nothing,” Ling began, his smile growing. “You know—“


End file.
